Tag Archives: Rosie Molinary

Self Care Tip: Schedule Yourself A Break

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schedule a break

This time of year is busy, busy, busy. Report cards, field trips, high stakes state testing wrap up, finals, marathon grading sessions, end-of-the-year celebration planning and all those hormonal students with spring fever… it is enough to make anyone want to schedule a mental health holiday.

The end of the school year always reminds me of a championship baseball game that has just gone into extra innings. Everything feels completely necessary and like every second counts.

My friend and author, Rosie Molinary used to think, “Maybe something mildly bad will happen, like a really bad flu or a minor car accident, so that I can take a little bit of time off.”

Sound like something you might say to yourself? Me too.

Let’s face it, even if you don’t work in a school, spring is an extra busy time. Even nature is going a million miles a minute: the birds, the bees, the pollen and the trees.

Stress city!

So rather than trying to keep going and going and going until you completely burn out, why not schedule yourself a break?

Start with an hour for yourself in the next couple of weeks: a restorative yoga class, a nap,  a massage, a manicure or pedicure, a run outside without any distraction.

Then why not schedule a half day? A hike at a nearby river or lake, a picnic by a stream, a good book under a tree, a yoga workshop with your favorite teacher, an afternoon taking pictures of signs of spring, writing in your journal in a café.

Then try a whole day and schedule absolutely nothing and see how the day unfolds. Maybe try a pajama day and see how you feel.

The idea behind these breaks is to give yourself a bit of space and breathing room. You may find you are happier and even more productive than you would have been without the break.

Does the idea of scheduling a break freak you out or are you already grabbing your planner?  Please share in the comments.

Post inspired by Beautiful You: A Daily Guide to Radical Self-Acceptance by Rosie Molinary. Specifically Day 306: Take a Personal Health Day and Day 57 Schedule Breaks.

Image Source: Serenity Retreat – Early Fall by FreeWine on Flickr (cc)

You Become What You Pay Attention To

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In class each week I try to share some nugget of wisdom I’ve picked up along the way. Recently most of what I’m sharing comes from my friend, Rosie’s book, Beautiful You.

Day 23: Realize That You Are What You Pay Attention To

She writes -

Consider this very simple truth. What we pay attention to, what we put our energy into, is a statement about what is important to us. It is a reflection of who we are.

She goes on to challenge the reader to examine and reflect where their attention and energy is spent and to make adjustments if they don’t like what they find.

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I’ve been limiting my intake of things that I don’t find helpful or kind (no more Law and Order SVU marathons for me) and I’ve found I’ve felt more at ease as a result.

Here are a few things I have found quite helpful lately.

  • Megan Francis’ The Kitchen Hour podcast. Specifically the episode with Math For Grownups author Laura Laing. In this podcast they talk about how to help your kids with math homework, online resources and how to deal with that pesky “new math”. I was completely riveted and wish I had known about this website and book earlier.
  • Joy the Baker podcast. Good lord, where do I start?  My child sings the theme song. Let’s just say these ladies have made their presence known (and loved) in our household. Can not say enough how much I crack up in every episode. I’ll bet you’ll want to be their best friends too.
  • Body Positive Yoga’s videos have brightened this curvy girl’s day. Amber is super funny and she knows her modifications for the three B’s: booty, belly and boobs. Such a great resource!
  •  How to Be Fascinating – Marie Forleo’s interview with Sally Hogshead. I was lucky enough to get a free deal because I subscribe to Marie’s weekly emails (and I will say I actually look forward to getting them each week because they are so good.) Turns out I’m a trendsetter – I see the future and would like you all to come with me. Sounds exactly right! In a world full of power yoga, I’m asking people to lay down and be quiet.
  • Brene Brown (one of my all time favorites) is sharing her favorite books. This is ridiculously exciting for a book nerd like me.
  • My friend Rosie is a genius (this post is inspired by something in one of her books!) and she has figured out the secret to life: unscheduled days. I know. Brilliant!

What are you putting your energy and attention these days?

Be Your Own Valentine!

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February is all about the love, obvs. But rather than focusing on other people’s love and such, I’m inviting you (and me) to be our own Valentines this month.

We can create some self-love by practicing extreme self-care this month. I’ll be posting some ideas during the month and I’ll keep you posted how I’m doing as well.

My first self-love/self-care challenge comes from Rosie Molinary‘s book, Beautiful You:

Day 223: Listen to Your Body and Respond

We spend a whole lot of time berating our bodies and not nearly enough time caring for them. It’s time to start focusing on being responsive to our body’s needs.

Challenge: Every hour stop and ask yourself “What am I feeling right now? What do I need?”

If you discover you need water, get some and drink. If you need to stretch your legs, take a short walk. If you need some connection, reach out to a friend. Whatever the need, take a few minutes to take care of it. Your body will thank you.

How are you planning to love yourself this month?

If you’d like to spend some time taking it easy and deeply relaxing in the company of others, come join me at It’s All Yoga on Tuesday nights at 7:15 for restorative yoga.

Image Source: Pinterest

Summer of Intentionality — Part One: To Read

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Last summer I came up with an ambitious list of activities which fell into three categories: To Read, To Learn, and To Do. The original reason behind all the summer planning came about because, quite honestly, I had a tendency to waste a lot of time on the internet and not have much to show for it.

So when I read about Rosie’s Summer of Intentionality, I knew this would be a way for me to best use my time away from the responsibilities of work.

Now that I’m home with Ruby, it’s still about making the best use of my summer time with my family and of my me time. Over the next few posts I’ll be revealing my To Read, To Learn and To Do lists.

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2012 Summer of Intentionality

To Read:

Clearly I am a non-fiction reader, so if you could suggest your do-not-miss fiction titles, I would greatly appreciate it.

What is on your summer reading list?

In Case You Missed It Edition! Volume 37

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{photo credit: Etsy – click image for source - PS I would not be sad to hang this in my house}

I’ve found some links to posts that made me laugh, cry, think or at least raise an eyebrow. Please click the links and check out the posts. You may find something that rocks your world too.

Leave me some feedback in the form of comments below on what you liked, what you hated and what you’d like to see more of. I’m here to help you find the best of what is online.

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My Best Of…

Where is the Mommy War For the Motherless Child? from Rage Against the Minivan – Kristen says it like it is and I like it. -

When it comes to issues of motherhood, there is one issue I care about: some kids don’t have one. All of these petty wars about the choices of capable, loving mothers is just a lot of white noise to me, Quite honestly, I’m often astonished at the non-essential parenting issues I see moms getting their panties in a wad about. Particularly when there are so many kids in this world not being parented at all.

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Chardonnay, Pantyhose, and Other Advice From My Mother from Aunt Peaches (via Small Notebook’s link post) – Just good advice.

My favorites:

…on kids with weird names
Make a special effort to be nice to kids with weird names. It’s not their fault their parents are idiots.

…on teachers
Expect 20% of your teachers to be bad at their job. This does not mean they are bad people, it just means they chose the wrong profession. Why should you suffer for their mistake?Learn to spot them and avoid them. For the other 80%, treat them as though they are the most important person you will ever meet. They probably are.

Be sure to click over and leave a comment about your favorite or the best advice you got from your mother.

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Reason #73 Why We Need Curvy Yoga - Anna pretty much sums it up with this:

- well-meaning teachers who shame students because they haven’t thought through the meaning of their words.

If you teach anything, especially yoga, please read this post.

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If I Had A Million Dollars from Amy at Coffee and Sunshine (formerly Just A Titch). Click over to see how I’d spend mine and leave a comment about how you’d spend yours. I found it more difficult than I thought it would be.

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I Spy from Rosie Molinary. Have you ever wondered if the photo you are looking at and comparing yourself to has been digitally altered? Most likely it has and the biggest tell is in the hands. Go check out Rosie’s post for more details and images. The Ralph Lauren model? WTF? Also see: stop comparing yourself to models who don’t even look like their pictures.

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That is the In Case You Missed It Edition, folks.

Remember to click the links and leave some comments. This is a conversation, you know.

In Case You Missed Edition Archives -click it to see them all.

Things I’m Afraid To Tell You: My Thoughts On Adoption and Birth Mothers

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As Mother’s Day draws nearer, I find myself getting unexpectedly weepy.

First off, now I’m a mom. A role I wasn’t sure I was ever going to have, certainly one I came to later in life. It’s all now really sinking in.

I’m someone’s mom.

Here’s the part where my experience is different from other mothers and where some deep sadness fills my heart.

In addition to being over the moon about our baby, I can’t help but think about Ruby’s birth mom. And how her loss has been the biggest gift we’ve ever received.

Our precious girl.

Talk about a double-edged sword. Someone else’s loss being your gain? Let’s not even talk about what the kids have lost. Totally does my head in.

A number of people have written so eloquently about what adoption has taught them , about how the adoptive parents (NOT the children) are the lucky ones and honoring their son’s birth mother, that I ask you grab your favorite beverage and read their posts. All these posts brought me to tears and made me want to add my thoughts about adoption and birth mothers which at this point are not very eloquent.

I do have to say that not all of our experiences are the same, however I feel a deep kinship with other adoptive parents. I wanted to highlight some of the ways adoption is heartbreakingly beautiful, with an emphasis on heartbreaking.

Since I’m having some trouble putting together my thoughts on adoption and birth mothers in an eloquent way, I’ll just list them in no particular order. I bring these topics up now because I’ve been an adoptive mama for a while now and believe it or not these have come up. In the spirit of transparency on the internet, many brave bloggers are sharing what they are afraid of. 

I do fear people are going to take offense to what I’m about to say. Some want to tell me our experience as mothers is exactly the same and while there are many commonalities, there are a few huge differences. Some will find out they’ve accidentally stepped on toes because they’ve been curious. Some will find my thoughts presumptuous. So be it.

I’m filing this post under: Things I’m Afraid To Tell You.

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While I do not know my daughter’s birth mother, we are connected and I am forever in her debt. Ruby is a gift. She’s changed me in totally wonderfully unexpected ways.

Sometimes I find myself sobbing because I missed the first nine months with Ruby. She was so well cared for which is a relief, however I ache for that lost time.

Please don’t ask to know the details of a birth mother’s circumstances – it isn’t your business. I am nosy by nature, so I get it. But really, not your (or my) business. It is an awkward moment for everyone involved. That story truly does belong to the adoptive child and when they are old enough may or may not wish to share those intimate details of their past with you.

I know I’ve already over-shared some of Ruby’s history with people because I have been caught off guard. I feel awful about this because it’s not my story to tell. If I’ve shared anything about this history, please do not share with anyone. If I haven’t, please don’t ask.

Please don’t make assumptions about birth mothers. There is no typical story. There is no archetype. They are women just like us, making difficult choices. And for god’s sake, please don’t make comments about how “some” people are “breeding” and are “crackheads” who just irresponsibly give birth multiple times.

Really? sounds like right-wing anti-woman propaganda from the 80s. 

Just stop it.

For all we know, the woman standing next to us in line at the grocery store has an adoption story. For some, it is a secret. I imagine, a painful one. Even without your judgement.

Please don’t judge birth mothers. They may or may not have different life styles than us.  Comments about how you could never give up a child aren’t helpful either. Under certain circumstances, we’d all make tough choices to hopefully better the life of our child.

Please don’t say adoptive parents are lucky or saintly for adopting a child – we really are the lucky ones. We are the ones gaining a child to love.

Please don’t give parenting advice until you are also parenting an adoptive child – some things are just different when you are starting your life from a loss. Also, we lean toward Attachment Parenting and would probably be parenting this way even with a biological child.

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What are you afraid to tell people? Please share in the comments or write a post of your own and link back.

Please know that comment kindness is greatly appreciated.

Thanks to EZ at Creature Comforts for the challenge. And Jess for getting it all started.

Self Acceptance Through Yoga: aka Back Off Beeotch

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image: WeHeartIt

Today you’ll find me guest posting on Rosie Molinary’s blog. Please check it out and be sure to leave a comment to let me know you stopped by. Yes, it’s a reprint…one worth repeating if you ask me.

While you’re there please be sure to poke around in Rosie’s archives. She’s got a bunch of excellent work on self-worth, beauty, self-acceptance and adoption.

A Challenge: Claim Your Care and A Wellness Prescription

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I’ve always had trouble with the holidays. Even as a child, I wasn’t that enthusiastic about them. Yes, I liked the presents part and some of the traditions and routines, but given I am such a creature of comfort and regularity, they tended to take their toll on me.

The rich food made it hard to sleep.

All the people made it hard to sleep.

Are you noticing a theme here?

Generally the loss of routine care got lost in the excitement.

As an adult, I’ve tended to be quite ill during the holidays. Colds, flu, respiratory infections.

Too much stress?

Too much food?

Not enough self-care?

I’m not quite sure of the answer, but I’ve made changes the last couple years to make the month of December more enjoyable {or at least more tolerable}.

This year, I will live with intention to truly take care of myself.

Starting in December, I’m following Rosie’s lead and making myself a wellness prescription and claiming my care.

Specifically I will:

  • First thing in the morning, a walk with Ruby – at least 30 minutes
  • Using Madeleine’s Manuel as a guide, I’ll consult my book of me when I’m out of sorts and try to solve my problem.
  • Back to the weight room twice a week – 20 minutes is all I need.
  • Soak, steam, sauna at least once a week – the Church of Quiet awaits.
  • Water, Emergen-C, multivitamin and vitamin D daily.
  • Listen to music – such a pleasure in my life and yet I need a reminder to do this.
  • Connect with my spouse – even if for just a 5 minute hug {Do you do this? If not, try it}.
  • A fruit and a veggie at every meal – remembering if I’m not hungry enough for an apple, I’m not really that hungry.
  • Minimize processed foods.
  • Keeping dairy out of my body – that means no cookies, no cake, no desserts unless they are vegan. {ps – I’m not saying you, dear reader, must say dairy-free, I must}.
  • Reading for pleasure – from a book or magazine – every day.
  • Schedule a massage {or two} before the end of the year.
  • Sleeping at least 7 hours at night – even if that means missing a turn or two in Words With Friends and going to sleep before 10.
  • Being with friends – in person, if possible – seriously, if we don’t have a date already let’s get something scheduled STAT.

What would be on your prescription for wellness? How would you claim your care?

43 Things Before 43

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For months I’ve been reading about other people’s Life Lists and wondering if I could ever make one without driving myself crazy with all the achieving and in-my-head competition.

Would my list be cool enough?

Would I really do everything I said I would?

What huge adventures await?

Inspired by Rosie’s birthday list, Sarah’s try new things before her birthday list and Amy’s Life List, I’ve decided to put together a list of things I would like to do before I turn 43.

Why 43 instead of 42?

My birthday is in 4 months and I don’t want to hurt myself getting it all done before then. My list is l-o-n-g, makes me think I needed to start this  thing in my 20s.

My intention with this list is to remind myself to have more fun, take care of myself and to do things out of the ordinary.

I’ll keep you posted on my progress.

The List:

1. Take my birthday (March 20th) off – no work, no obligations – just fun.

2. Take an anti-gravity yoga class.

3. Road trip to Portland with Ruby.

4. Take Ruby to see live music.

5. Read 43 books.

6. Put my feet in the ocean with Ruby.

7. Pick berries.

8. Go on retreat.

9. Teach an active yoga class.

10. Go to the movies by myself. {Yep, I’ve never done this. I have, however, gone to a rock show on my own so don’t feel too sorry for me.}

11. Attend a service at a Universal Unitarian church.

12. Explore the Taiwanese culture in Sacramento.

13. Learn 10 words/phrases in Mandarin.

14. Run a 5K.

15. Write a fan letter.

16. Rent a house at the coast or in the mountains.

17. Teach a class on social media and blogging to teachers.

18. Sleep outside.

19. Do a swim workout.

20. Watch my first students graduate from high school.

21. Spend a week away from the Internet.

22. See a play.

23. Go to a sing along at the Crest.

24. Take a photography class.

25. Take a cooking class.

26. Take a private yoga class.

27. Actually make something I’ve pinned on Pinterest.

28. Go to the ballet.

29. Have a family portrait taken.

30. Watch a movie outside in the backyard.

31. Take Ruby on a hike.

32. Help a friend start a blog.

33. Build an outdoor shower.

34. Make a wall of bookshelves in the dining room.

35. Redesign the entryway and make it pretty and useful.

36. Start a mom/play group in Midtown.

37. Teach a class at my gym.

38. Organize the pantry.

39. Get rid of all the shoes I don’t wear because they are uncomfortable.

40. Take a nap in a hammock.

41. Host a baby shower.

42. Take a photo every day.

43. Make the Book of Me into a book.

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Do you make yearly plans? A Life List? Would you like to?

I’d love to hear about yours.

And I’d love for you to join me in making my list a reality. Please let me know if you’d like to do any of my 43 with me.

Summer of Intentionality Part One: What I Want to Learn

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Thinking back over the summers since becoming a teacher I’ve noticed a pattern. International travel every other year and lots of hanging out not doing much the other years.

Not a bad gig, if you can get it.

But this summer is different. This summer is the summer before we become parents.

We’ve got baby things to prepare for and house projects galore. The travels of  past summers were exciting and gave me lots of cool things to talk about, but if I’m honest, a lot of that time wasn’t time spent on purpose.

The hanging out doing nothing much? Clearly, not so mindful.

This summer shall be different. This summer shall be full of intention and mindfulness.

And FUN!

Let’s not forget the FUN!

I declare summer 2011 the Summer of Intentionality.

Thanks to my Twitter friend, author Rosie Molinary, for inspiring this project.

Here’s her summer list.

What I Want to Learn:

1. How to edit photos.

I’ve downloaded Picasa and my new photos of the old 97′s show last weekend. Sounds like a match made in heaven.

2. How to Skype.

This was a Winter Break intention and yet still no webcam. I will join the 21st century this summer!

3. How to knit.

Recently I saw some women knitting at the airport looking so peaceful, I decided in that moment I wanted to become one of them. Knitting looks like quiet activity that keeps me busy, but doesn’t involve a screen.

4. How to use the weight room at the gym.

So many interesting machines and I have no idea how to use them. My thinking is I’ll better mix up my workouts and keep it fresh.

5. How to be a traveler in my own backyard.

Growing up in the San Francisco Bay Area was great, except for the part I never went to any of the attractions because I grew up there. This summer I plan to make a bunch of day trips back to the Bay Area to see the sights and escape the Sacramento heat.

Goals:

Ferry to San Francisco

Brush up on my science and get inspired for next school year at the Academy of Sciences.

See some of Picasso’s pieces at the DeYoung.

Take in some modern art at SFMOMA.

Stick my toes in the sand and swim in the ocean at Stinson Beach.

What is your must see/do in San Francisco?

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Stay tuned for more Summer of Intentionality goals: What I Want to Read and What I Want to Do.

Feel free to join in the fun.

Would you like to teach me how to do my stuff or learn along side me?

Would you like to come up with a list of your own?

I’d love to hear how you are spending your summer.  Leave your plans in the comments.


Saturday Senses

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A way to capture the spirit of each week…

i took that photo!

{photo credit: me}

tasting :: strawberry lemonade popsicle from fat face inside bows and arrows. it’s going to be a delicious summer.

hearing ::  mine has returned to normal after the amazing old 97′s show at harlow’s last saturday night.

smelling :: cookies, cakes and muffins – oh my! my students loved sweet treats at their end of the year celebration.

seeing :: twenty + resting yogis this week. we’re starting a resting revolution, friends!

feeling ::  grateful for the few minutes of conversation with rhett after the show. topics: twitter, kids, a cheer squad meet up in the middle of the country – {he suggested chicago} and the glamour of life on the road.

wishing/hoping :: for the sweet balance between complete freedom and intentionality with my precious time off.

What about you?

What are your senses this Saturday?

Looking back, how was your week?

Leave a comment and tell me all about it. I’d seriously love to hear about your week. Now’s not the time to be shy.

This weekly tradition inspired by Pink of Perfection’s Five Sense Friday.

Don’t forget to click the links!

In Case You Missed It Edition! Volume 31

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{via}

Each week I’ll give you links to posts that made me laugh, cry, think or at least raise an eyebrow. Please click the links and check out the posts. You may find something that rocks your world too.

Leave me some feedback in the form of comments below on what you liked, what you hated and what you’d like to see more of. I’m here to help you find the best of what is online.

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A completely insane week. I can’t believe I was just in Texas last week. Nutty.

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My Best Of…

Do you ever feel like you are living a double life? A work you and a you you? My life is definitely much more integrated than ever before and yet Summer Tams still exists. Check out Madeleine’s post about bringing yourselves back together: Code Names and Living A Double Life

Interested in learning to meditate and aren’t sure where to start? Check out The Open Heart Project.

We Are What We Do – kinda says it all, huh? via Charlotte’s Fancy.

What are you doing this summer? My new favorite blogger, Rosie Molinary’s, post Summer of Intentionality got my wheels churning.

Jenna from This Is My Happiness (formerly Adventures of a 21st Century Family) did an awesome post about an upcoming Picasso exhibit straight from Musée National Picasso, Paris. I’m adding it to my summer today list right now, what about you?

Speaking of this summer…. have you read Good Enough is the New Perfect yet? If not, get yourself a copy and start thinking about what you’d say to the author is you got to meet her because Hollee Schwartz Temple will be in Sacramento at It’s All Yoga in late June. Details to follow.

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That is the In Case You Missed It Edition for this week, folks.

Remember to click the links and leave some comments. This is a conversation, you know.

In Case You Missed Edition Archives -click it to see them all.