Tiny Tips Tuesday: My Secret for Maintaining Self-Care Practices

long term self care

Dear Friend,

Recently several people have asked how I maintain a meditation practice (and a yoga practice and a writing practice). They were trying to learn my “secret” so they could add these useful practices into their own lives.

My secret is pretty simple.

Don’t let perfect be the enemy of the good – Voltaire

Nothing is perfect. I no longer let myself get caught up in the limiting belief that a practice has to be or look a certain way for it to “count” because if I did, nothing would ever be good enough.

Easier said than done and definitely a daily practice, but seriously life changing.

For example, for my meditation practice to happen each day I have to do it before I do anything else. Sometimes I meditate before I get out of bed to pee. Sorry for the TMI, but I’m being real here. If I really have to go, I will and then get right back in bed to start.

Is now a good time to tell you that my meditation practice takes place in my bed, under the covers and on most days laying down?

I know it’s not how meditation is “supposed” to work, but it works for me.

My yoga practice follows the same principle of not letting the perfect get in the way of the good.

In an ideal world I’d devote 90 minutes on my mat each and every day. In reality my phone reminds me every day to “DO YOGA” and my physical practice is sometimes a single restorative pose (on my bed) before I teach my class. Sometimes it is rolling out two mats -one for me and one for my daughter- and moving the dining room table out of the way so we can play. We pull out all the props, turn up some “yoga music” {usually the Freedom 90 or Queen station on Pandora) and see what happens.

Again, not how it is “supposed” to work, but it works for me.

The same for my writing practice. Ideally I would spend the first 2 or 3 hours a day first thing (post meditation, of course) writing my most perfect prose. The reality is that I write in fits and spurts daily. I brain storm and keep my ideas in Google docs and write skeleton outlines and fill in the details in my head while I push my daughter on the swing at the park. Every afternoon I spend some time writing something.

Again, not how it’s “supposed” to look, but it works for me.

Have you ever been stopped from doing something you wanted to because the perfect got in the way of the good enough?

With lots of love and compassion,



PS – If you find this helpful or know someone who would, please be sure to pass it on. Sharing is caring!

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Other posts you might like:

Tips for Starting and Maintaining A Daily Meditation Practice

Meditation Mantra or How To Stay In The Moment Without Losing Your Marbles

7 Steps to Jump Start Your Meditation Practice

In Case You Missed It Edition, Volume 17


Each week I’ll give you links to posts that made me laugh, cry, think or at least raise an eyebrow. Please click the links and check out the posts. You may find something that rocks your world too.

Leave me some feedback in the form of comments below on what you liked, what you hated and what you’d like to see more of. I’m here to help you find the best of what is online.


My Best Of…

Hollee over at The New Perfect talks about how she hates blogging because she feels every post must be perfect (holla). She also admits she may have a tiny author crush on our favorite TED talk (researcher) storyteller,  Brene Brown who wrote a new book called  The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.

I’d love to start a book club with this book. Are you interested?


Monday marks the 100th day of school for me which means 80 more until summer break! J and I are already talking about taking a trip this summer to….. wait for it…… San Francisco!

We grew up across the Bay from the City and now even though we live within 2 hours, we’ve never spent a proper holiday there. When we travel to SF, we do our thing and return either to the East Bay for a slumber party with friends or overnight with his mom or drive all the way back to Sacramento to sleep in our own bed.

Not this time! We’ve decided it is time to take the plunge and stay a few days in The City and play tourist.

Please leave a comment about your favorite thing to do, place to stay, and food not to miss in San Francisco.

The Simple Dollar also serves up 10 Things To Look For When Planning a Summer Vacation if you are also looking for inexpensive ways to fund your summer vacation.


Curvy Girls Unite!

I love, love, love Frocks and Frou Frou and this post Breaking the Rules knocks it out of the park. Lilly, the model and author behind this inspiring fashion blog, takes on the fashion do’s and don’ts.

Yoga Journal is holding a cover model talent search. Anna, the brilliant mind behind Curvy Yoga, is advocating that all the curvy yoga peeps submit their pictures for consideration. She’s taking it a step further and is asking for photos for an upcoming post featuring all the curvy folks in their favorite poses.

Wouldn’t you love to see more realistic body shapes on the cover of Yoga Journal?

I am totally in.

We’re thinking about setting up a little photo shoot – want to join in the fun?


Wolves – I laughed until I cried. It’s wrong, but it’s funny.


Cleanse update:  It’s OVER!

Please don’t think I am going to return to my earlier ways. At least not all of them – I feel too good to go back now. I learned a lot this month:

I am, indeed, gluten intolerant.  Rice substitutes are quite delicious and fairly easily available so I’ll keep those.

Dairy has been on my mind for a month and I am hoping to have a smooth reintroduction. Visions of gulping a gallon of milk while holding a fist full of cheese have been dancing around in my head for a while, but I think I’ll take it slow. I would hate to over do it.

Cleanse-worthy dishes are quite delicious. All it takes it some planning, shopping, chopping and applying heat before you eat. Keeping in mind this is an act of self-care/love will help keep that in perspective.


That is the In Case You Missed It Edition for this week, folks.

Remember to click the links and leave some comments. This is a conversation, you know.

In Case You Missed Edition Archives -click it to see them all.

In Case You Missed It Edition – Volume 11


Each week I’ll give you links to posts that made me laugh, cry, think or at least raise an eyebrow. Please click the links and check out the posts. You may find something that rocks your world too.

Leave me some feedback in the form of comments below on what you liked, what you hated and what you’d like to see more of. I’m here to help you find the best of what is online.


My Best Of…

Is it just me or does anyone else suffer from the if-it-can’t-be-perfect let’s call the whole thing off?     Perfect is the enemy of the good from the Simple Dollar.

Keeping with the perfection is not the goal club – another awesome interview over at the Happiness Project.

I’ve been in a scarf tying rut. I’m a European and Simple Neck Loop junkie. No longer! From now on, I’ll be mixing it up more. Learn how to tie a scarf here.

Ever since I declared my 11 Things for 2011 – I’ve been a decluttering machine. Although I’ll admit at one point I was walking around in circles muttering to myself wondering where to start. These 3 Questions helped get me started.

Stop. The. Presses. I know these are meant to help your “parents” with their computer issues, but I think I might be old enough to BE the parent. In any case, if you’ve got questions about using your computer to make phone calls, or upgrading your browser or video chatting (!) or well anything else click here for easy to-to videos.


That is the In Case You Missed It Edition for this week, folks.

Remember to click the links and leave some comments. This is a conversation, you know.

In Case You Missed Edition Archives: Volume 10,  Volume 9, Volume 8, Volume 7,  Volume 6,  Volume 5,  Volume 4,  Volume 3,  Volume 2,  Volume 1

Cutting Through the Crap: Can I Really Eliminate What Gets In My Own Way?

Prompt: Writing. What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?


Procrastination is my key avoidance tactic for everything important and writing falls into that category.

Procrastination – or busyness – will protect me from all the monsters in my head: the chorus of self-doubters, the harsh critics, the if-it-isn’t-perfect-it-couldn’t-possibly-good-enoughs.

I’m so busy!

I have a full-time job,

a part-time job,

another quasi part-time job….

I haven’t got the time to write really good posts!

Social media is an amazing tool for distraction – I can look around the web “for ideas”, click refresh on Twitter to see what people are talking about, check in with my readers on Facebook and leave a blog comment.

Social media is part of blogging, right?

You have to be part of the conversation, right?

What it comes down to is this: I avoid getting quiet enough for my real writing, the juicy uncomfortable bits, to shine through.

Call it procrastination, but really it more like fear.

Or self-doubt.

Or perfectionism.

Will I be able to eliminate it?


Is there something that gets in the way of what is important to you?

Today’s Prompt is from:

Author: Leo Babauta

Yoga+Music365 (day32) – Blame It On Gravity by Old97s- The Blindfolded Yoga Edition!

Blindfolded yoga?

I so didn’t make this up.

That would be Michelle.

She’s a fancy yoga teacher who is taking a month off from teaching. She’s been doing this for years, so she can get away with that wackiness. She knows what she’s doing and people trust her. They know she’s driving and so they follow her lead.

She’s pretty much a genius.

And she’s trusting me to sub for her during her time off.


That’s a lot of pressure.

I’ve talked to my Monsters and we’ve come to an agreement.

I’ve practiced my class at home, taught it to my wonderfully patient dude, and I promise to remember to breathe during the class.

I’ll also keep in mind that everyone there isn’t expecting Michelle because they all read her blog about her February Recess.

But back to the Blindfolded Yoga…

As soon as I put the blindfold on, I was filled with a sense of peaceful euphoria. All the striving and ego I fight against in the higher level classes just disappeared.  I was free to practice with all my focus internally. I was able to really let go of the anxiety I had been feeling about teaching and settle into concentrating on being in the moment. Of course all those moments included trying not to fall over myself or my props.

For a few minutes I was able to really live in the moment and that’s what yoga is all about.

Today’s yoga brought to you by the home practice! I’ve got to contain my nervous energy somehow.

Today’s music is Blame It on Gravity by Old97s.

Don’t forget FREE Fridays at 4:30 with the new It’s All Yoga teachers (21st and X in Sacramento) – you’ve got to sign up online www.itsallyoga.com

I’m teaching 3/5/10 – so mark your calendar.

For the month of February, I’m teaching a Level 1/2 on Mondays at 5:45. Come join me.

There Are Monsters All Up In There!

At 4:30 am I woke up from an awful dream. I was scheduled to teach a yoga class and it was at the house where I grew up. The room where I was to be teaching was longer and more narrow than I remembered, so I switched to another room only to find it stuffed full of furniture and people waiting.

There were couches and coffee table after coffee table after coffee table, and dining room tables. A bar had been set up and needed to be moved and even coffee and Danish.

And did I mention all the people?

Even my dad was there. He said he wanted to try yoga. He’d heard from someone it’s really good for you and since I’m teaching now, he was there for my class.

Are you effing kidding me?

My dad?

The people just kept coming. They didn’t have their mats or their clothes or any of their yoga stuff. There was a sense of anticipation.The time kept ticking and the furniture moving was going at a snail’s pace.

When would we start? How would we ever begin with all the talking, milling about, furniture moving? How would we fit everyone there?

Everyone kept asking me questions…. thinking I was in charge. Like I knew what to do in these strange circumstances. Like I WAS IN CHARGE….

I kept reminding myself to breathe and that it would be ok.

Except I didn’t even believe myself.

I guess my Monsters are trying to tell me something.

It’s now 5am, I’m blogging and I’ve got heartburn.

I guess you could say I’m losing my freaking marbles about subbing for Michelle (my badass, seemingly perfect, rock star teacher) .

I guess you could say that I’m feeling like I need to plan the perfect class and prepare for everything that may happen.

I need to find the perfect story/poem to start the class.

I need to come up with the perfect sequence for every single person in the class.

I need to know every modification and prop to support every person in every pose.

I need to say the perfect words for every pose and have witty, but not too witty banter between poses.

Simply put, I need ME to be perfect.

Can someone talk to my MONSTERS for me?

I am having trouble getting through.

Michelle said she felt better after she let hers rant and rave for a while.


I’ve just got heartburn.